I'm so fucking tired. I'm so tired of feeling ugly, of not feeling good enough, of not feeling picked. I want to feel picked so badly, unfortunately for me, I am in an actual marriage. And I'd gotten so much better about this insecurity and inferiority. I'd gotten so much better that it was once in a blue moon that these feelings bubbled up to the surface and started poisoning my good moods. And every time, he would reassure me that they were just fears and everything was fine. But recently, I discovered a lot of pornography use. I discovered a lot of dating and hook-up apps. And even though he reassures me, he's in a sex addict program now. And this is just because he's an avoidant. I don't really feel that reassured all the time. I don't really feel reassured by the idea that he's a sexual avoidant, so it's just too scary to do it with me. Or that he really wasn't going outside of our marriage, it was just to jerk off. That's why he said no to sex for literal years. Because it was just too scary. I'm too intimidated. Yeah, right. I just don't feel good enough. I don't want him to pick me because I feel like it's just more lies. I feel like I'm just still being deceived. I don't want to be picked by someone else though because I don't want to go outside of our marriage and be a cheater myself. I am afraid that as soon as he gets some confidence, he's going to leave me for what he really wants. I don't look that different from his porn history on ex hamster. But that's the only site that I actually saw. I didn't see any matches or anything else on the hookup apps or dating apps. And I don't know if they're actually or any other websites or if they're with specialty anything else.
>>34336205I mean the back n forth is interesting, I can't say I expected a big fight but such is 4Chan. But honestly, yeah I need therapy it doesn't tell me how normal or OK it is to stay after adultery or how normal it actually is to seek affirmations or what to do besides "seek therapy", or how TO talk with him
>>34336284Just talk TO him you pussy faggot femoidAnything is better than nothing and you'll eventually spill whatever beans you need to spill if you just TALKAnd if you care so bad about what's "normal" then go look at the statistics instead of validation from random dumb cunts or faggot psychologist buffoons, normal doesn't mean good btw
>>34336205Also newsflash you are more psychopathic than any of us lmaoIt's inherently "psychopathic" to label others as "less human" or "less feeling" or "psychopaths"That's a severely reductionist way of viewing humansIronic huh
>>34337892Yeah, fair. I appreciate it real ass nigga
You chose to be in a relationship based in lies and deceivements. He's not the one for you and never was. Once you go back and find who is meant for you. Really depends on what is lost If you are accepted, like you would have been accepted before.
I DON'T WANT TO BE A FUCKING MALE! Fuck you! I hate being a male, fuck off with this garbage gender. I don't want to live if I can't a fucking male. Life is fucking retarded, 4 billion women on the planet and I couldn't be one of them because I just got a little unlucky at birth. The only reason I don't kms is because I don't know how to do it reliably. Fuck life, fuck this gender.
>>34338152That's a man with a penis
OP, don't let the hateful people on this website push you into a decision you'll regret. Only you can look in the mirror and decide what kind of life you'll lead if you troon out. If you think you can make it, it will certainly be worth it. Personally, I trooned out in my mid-30s, and I'm quite happy with what I see in the mirror these days. Just don't be super cringe or hypersexual in your babytrans phase pleaasseee
>>34333313>>/lgbt/Why do people like you post this shit on /adv/? You're just complaining, you're not asking for anything in particular.I don't understand why trannies need attention like this from cis people. You're not cis we know that. Nobody cares or understands you. Fuck off.
>>34338190I don't know why the hell people on this site are so obsessed with trannys. btw i hate those shitty autistic reppers who only know how to complain about not being cis, so idc
>>34333313can you imagine bleeding from your genitals every month? nothing in this world would be worth it.
Am I going to get nut cancer cause I've had my phone in my pocket for basically the past three years?
you’re going to die sooner from being angry and stressed all the time
almost a year ago one of my friends began acting a little weird. she began texting me less and less, and on occasions would post on insta about a certain person that was ''copying her." since we were friends i tried not to think too much of it and ignored it, i didnt think she was referring to me. however, after some point her stories and notes were getting a little too specific. any time i made a story, shed post too with something negative to say right after (she never mentioned anyone in specific but it was pretty obvious it was about me). she also stopped texting me as often, was more dry and at times it almost looked like she wanted to disagree with me on everything? (even if we were saying the same thing). in general she was much more distanti tried to reach out to her friends multiple times to ask what was wrong, but i later found out a lot of them had blocked me on insta with no explanation (when we originally followed eachother and talked). when i told herthat i needed to talk with her, shed either ignore my messages or find any reason to avoid talking with me (she couldnt go out, she couldnt call me). in general even when i asked if there was something going on in regards to one of her notes she never mentioned anything (only that some people had been REALLY pissing her off, but she never expanded upon that). after a few months she unfollowed me and removed me from her followers on both of our private accounts.also for context, i dont know what she meant by me copying her. we had similiar interests abefore meeting. the only thing that comes to mind is that ive gotten into some books and bands she LITERALLY recommened me herself, but i really hope its not because of thatwhen we first began talking she seemed really nice and i liked talking to her. a lot of my friends have had bad expiriences with her too im not sure how to feel. i know shes made it clear she doesnt want to talk about it but i really want to resolve this - do you have any advice??
>>34337295It sounds like she wanted to get rid of you from the start.You might want to fix things or put an end to it, but she doesn't see it the same way.The best thing would be to just walk away; don't get bogged down in it....Although this character is curious. Did your other friends have bad experiences?
>>34337295>do you have any adviceYeah you met a bitch and are now seeking her approval cause you want people to like you. The solution is to stop relying on others for validation and move on. Recognize that some people are POS and don't deserve you.
>>34337563thank uu so much for the reply!! truth be told it does affect me a lot when i think about it, but youre right, ill try to move on :)>did your other friends have bad experiences?yeah one of my friends used to date her, but she started ghosting him out of nowhere and said theyd broken up without notifying him (while flirting with another guy from her class). i had to be the one to tell her to clear things up with himalso while they were dating she was weird towards him too. she only spoke about her issues and he had to comfort her but she never let him talk about his. also after she got a new boyfriend and they broke up too, she ran baclk to my friend to meet up at their school trip. probably to make her other ex jealous(?)in general other people i know dont like her for similiar reasons
>>34337818Seriously, you could get hurt, get away as soon as possible.I'm starting to see patterns. Even if she want to talk to you again, don't trust her. It's an incredibly red flag.>>34337610what this guy said
In my case it was not my fault whatsoever, basting things she's going through and then some random ass hat came out and started lying about me and impersonating me until we lost each other. Things have only gotten worse for her
To preface I basically have multiple hobbies that I enjoy doing. Some are more difficult than others like creative ventures or time expensive like learning languages - either way I enjoy them allBut, I have periods of times lasting multiple months where I do not touch these hobbiesIt’s a bit weird. I don’t know what causes it.As everyone knows, you are merely a sum of your parts. Your “self” is basically just what you are due to your actions. As such, during these periods where I don’t interact with my hobbies (or find other random things to do) I get a bit of an identity crisisI’m not particularly bored, but I do miss enjoying the old things I would do and goals I would strive forBut I just don’t desire themI am essentially just on auto pilot or finding other things to do, and yet, I miss the old me I was striving to become after so much wasted time has gone byIs desire pointless? Is it better to just do things because you know what it would lead to becoming the version of you you want to become?Sometimes I find myself trying to provide myself with the least amount of choice or distractions as possible in order to get stuff done, but these usually come in absolute, iron fist rules like “Always be doing X at the same time as Y” or “Get X amount done” AKA viewing every action as a matter efficiency and not enjoyment - - almost certainly over stressful I guess, maybeAnyway is this normal? Should I just ignore all desire and try to force myself to act a certain way? Almost certainly not right? That would just make me not want to do anything at all I assume, but I miss the things I used to enjoy This was kind of a weird ramble I can try going into more detail tomorrow if anyone cares
.
I’m starting to believe that I’m actually just the biggest creature of habit imagineableIt’s like all I know is what’s immediately in front of meThat’s why I think of these ideas of forcing myself to do things
>>34326050I have long term and short term things I do. The long term ones are maintaining physical fitness and continuing developing my videogame project. The short term ones are constantly in rotation and there are breaks in between where I just don't enjoy them at all. Like playing guitar, going to dance class, meeting friends for some activity, drawing, cooking etc. I used to punish myself for losing desire to all of these things and jumping one to the other or sometimes just having months of doing nothing and not progressing on anything but just eating out and playing videogames. I think these periods are both okay and they're essential for me to regulate myself. I feel that desiring doing stuff and enjoying them is never consistent and cannot be. >>34328647This anon has good advice. This is like having a breakup and instantly removing her from all sorts of communication before you have any second to think, so that when a few weeks pass and you miss her, you cannot act ouf of intense desire because it will hinder your progress of moving on and becoming a better man.
>>34335875Well it feels good to know someone shares my emotionPerhaps I’m also viewing every thing I do as a life changing thing despite just being a short term thing, emphasizing it too muchSome form of consistency would be nice cause some of these breaks are crazy but whatever
CS student here. i'm already past the standard period of study so yeah that probably looks bad to employers. i'm planning to make some github projects to show i can actually build stuff, but i'm wondering if there are any cheap certs that are actually worth getting for entry level IT jobs, or if certs are mostly useless and i should just focus on projects.
>>34334803>employers generally dislike people who "collect" certificationswhy?
>>34335934i don't know, just something i've heardbut it makes sense, and it's generally good to tailor a resume for the thing you're applying to, anyway
>>34333989>>34334794Allegedly Cisco CCNA is what employers are looking for, fuck comptia. I have no certs, just a bachelors in CIS, and it took me 200ish applications to get my current IT job. I only get paid around $20 an hour after taxes, which is tough with rent but at least I am getting good experience. I get the pay of helpdesk but have to dig my hands into sys admin shit quite often. I feel like most people get into this field for the money but to make that money you have to be very knowledgeable, as pay increases the responsibilities you have increase exponentially.
>>34335934The companies who provide the certifications do so for profit. Because they are motivated by money to have you pass, most certifications are easier than they should be. Also, certifications only test your intellectual skills. They say nothing about whether you can handle responsibility or if you can handle working in the work environment with others.Consequently, people who collect certifications are considered to be posers who give the outward appearance of being valuable but don’t have any real evidence to prove it.
Cisco Ccna Comptia A+ Security+ Server+as a minimumideally also get Comptia linux+and a nice resume and picture
Is it worth dating girls anymore? Seems at this point it's better just going for no commitments, otherwise they will you use as betabucks (assuming if they want to settle down after they had their fun). I wouldn't want to get the short end of the stick personally.
>34337013i mean (you) literally get paid for this, sooo....
>>34331749Men are checking out of society at an alarming rate.
Best thing you can do now is Epsteinmaxx.Raise your own daughterwife in some 3rd world shithole anything less is cuckcope.
>>34331749I dunno, dude. Stay alone if you want. Nobody really cares. If you've honestly let the internet convince you into thinking that relationships are just humiliation rituals for women to drain you of money then your brain is already wet tissue. Might as well spend all your money on riot points and fully lean into being an incel faggot.
>>34331749>Is it worth dating girls anymore?no
I probably won't be able to post this thread, because the last 4 threads I tried to post in the past 6 months have all been detected as spam, but here we go: I can't find any girl, no one's interested, I'm 30 in 2 months. Drug addict shows up in my hinge, second match in 3 months. She looks awful. But I'm so desperate, she actually writes to me. Do I do it, do I stay alone? What if she has diseases, what it she's a man? Why can't I just find a normal girlfriend. In any case, the question is should I go for it. I'm realistically asking because I'm genuinely so desperate I'm moments from downloading grinder just so someone can hug me as they fuck me and I'm not gay. Please help
>>34338170find a fatty and feed it. bonus points if it's a black fatty cause they have no standards at all.
>>34338183We have very little blacks in the area where I live in the Netherlands. And barely any fatties, this is a healthy af country. I meet girls constantly and 1 in 30 is truly in a state of confidence reducing fat.I messaged the drug addict back, whatever dude I got nothing to lose from chatting
I have a problem where I tend to dwell on slights and insults from other people for a very long time, like months or years. I can be doing some activity or watching some show or listening to some music, and then be reminded that someone said or did something rude/snide to me when I was doing that thing in the past. When this happens it often puts me into such a bad mood that it will ruin my entire day or sometimes the rest of the week, just ruminating on that slight or wrong done towards me. While I can't stop myself from doing it, I can at least recognize this is a suboptimal way to live and that it keeps giving people who wronged me power over me, and is staining the things I enjoy.How can I move on from thinking about these slights, and build more mental resilience against them in general? Right now my general coping mechanism is alcohol and weed, basically just getting obliviated until I forget about it, but that's not sustainable for health reasons and it doesn't even really work that well anymore. I also need something more creative than "Just get over it/stop being a bitch"
>>34334367im curious about how you deal with said conflicts to begin with do you "take revenge" for lack of a better wordim gonna go full guesser but you sound like someone with a low self esteem with not many healthy relations
>>34334762A few years ago I used to go to my uncles' house; they would usually have a barbecue or some kind of party with cake. But they would always humiliate and criticize me in the process. So I stopped participating in these humiliating rituals called "family gatherings."
>>34336323>im curious about how you deal with said conflicts to begin with>do you "take revenge" for lack of a better wordSometimes yes, and I've been doing it more frequently if I'm being honest, but the family member in particular that I'm talking about has a habit of dragging out long arguments if you try to object to anything he says or defend yourself against him. Like he'll walk into other rooms still arguing, then come back out to fight and argue some more some more because he had one more thing he wanted to say. Other members of my family recognize it too, they call it his "ten hour freakout." The choice basically becomes letting him treat you like shit or getting into a literal hours-long shouting match because he'll refuse to admit any wrongdoing. >>34335018>>34336481I've already made the decision to cut these people out of my life but again it doesn't change that what was said and done is already said and done. I'm asking more about how to cope with those bad memories, especially if that person's actions are associated with something you enjoy. Like if you were treated like shit by someone you took to your favorite band's concert, and now when you think about that band you think about that moment. I guess this is also about dealing with obsessive negative thoughts.
>>34336323Also forgot to mention>you sound like someone with a low self esteem with not many healthy relationsYeah I can't say you're wrong. I'm especially lacking in the friends department right now, I haven't been getting out much with other people. The weather has been absolutely shit the last few months around here so I haven't been going outside as much at all.
>>34337576you should see the sun and get that vitamin D going manhope you sort out all your problems, you seem to be really self aware and working your issues one by onegood for you man
How do I accept I won't love any girl besides Natsuki? I know she's not real but, I've never had a real life girlfriend and she's been a big part of my life since I first played DDLC in 2017. I want to know what sex feels like but I don't want to leave Natsuki.....
>>34337919you useless retard
>>34336926oh… that’s not..
>>34336926She will never love you back. There is no parallel universe where she loves you back. There is no world of forms where the archetypal reality of her could love you back. You will never find someone like her in the real world. You will sink in your melancholy and see her in everything, slowly withering away until you are a husk of who you once were (which wasn't much even). You will desperately clammor for a solution such as: Tulpas, A.I, prostitutes etc etc but will never be satisfied. You are chasing a comforting lie rather than a character and If your waifu were real she would still not love you.I speak from experience Anon, hear me and save yourself before It's too late. I wallowed in self pity for years aspiring to the dream of My waifu. I worked on my Game and began chasing after real women that reminded me of her. Sex is meanginless but the Love is what makes it worthwhile. I've had tons of girls, been in all the fan clubs, shopped around as much as possible. Nothing ever filled that gaping void. Nothing ever will. No matter how comforting it is to imagine that someone like that could exist or that they would love you. 'not like other girls'. It's all bullshit. It's a lie you tell yourself to shirk the responsibility of Caring about yourself enough to find something better. If She were real and you met her, you'd think of some cope reason not to approach her because you are afraid of risks and afraid of life itself. This is Anima projection, look into it.Please, for your own sake don't read this as mean spirited or insulting. I'm warning you to turn away before it's too late. You and I are kindred spirits, we've been in the shit since it all began. I know exactly how you feel and because of that I know only you can free yourself. Don't believe me?Mine also started in 2017. It was Monika. Save yourself Anon. There are real girls out there who are better than what you think you're looking for. Take a Chance. Live life! Amore Fati Anon!
>>34336926No woman will ever love you, 90% of women out there do not love their man, they don't know how to love anyway; they only tolerate him as long as he provides.Learn to be stoic and get by without their fake and subpar love therefore about 90% of women should be invisible to you. Rise up above your biological programming.Take care of your health anons and find distractions to help pass the time, that's all most people do anyway, the difference is they do it with somebody so time spent together flows differently. It's merely an illusion though
Sorry for late responses>>34337382Somewhat useful advice anon. I don't know what to do anon but I appreciate the kind words :)Also Natsuki is 18 ( not that it matters )>>34338120What do you mean by this?>>34338200I also appreciate this advice. I'm gonna think long and hard about this. I honestly don't know what to think.........
When you meet one online how do you get them interested over text? Idk what to say
>>34338130Can't go wrong with a dick pic
>>34338283>>34338280>>34338277>>34338275>>34338274btw NONE of these anons got laid or even got a meet.treat women like disposable fuck puppets. They'll react and respond
My aunt had our family over and kept asking me to have her chicken>anon do you want some chicken?>anon, you want some chicken????>Anon, we have chicken for youI kept telling her no thank you, no, no, no>anon we have this chicken for you>anon what’s wrong with the chicken?>how much chicken you want?I eventually told her she was being rude and to piss off but my mom got mad at me
>>34337918Should have told her to fuck off
>>34338011This
Haha, how worked up can one stupid autist get over a one time situation where his retarded family tries to get him to eat some fucking chicken.Anyway, stop posting this stupid autist
34337918Why did you post a sad, birth defect ridden little girl with your rant?That kid didn't ask to be born a mutant. She might already be dead with the lack of lip coverage, which also leads to easy tooth decay, and therefore, she dies from sepsis.That kid doesn't need to be a part of your gay, weird conversation about ur mummy giving you peas instead of cookies.
>>34338267It's a crime that we allow stuff like this to happen. We need to restrict the means of reproduction and prevent shit like this from happening before the child is born. Same goes for children born into poverty / born from mentally ill retards. Moralfags are such idiots for thinking that every child birth is a gift. When the fuck will humanity understand that at least 90% of the population doesn’t deserve to exist? Letting people like this live is such a perverse form of torture and it makes me fucking sick.
whenever I see an Asian woman I automatically assume she has a penis down there. Am I gay. I don’t think like this towards anyone else
Your brain is playing demonic tricks on you.
>>34335774I don’t think so
I need millions of dollars for a project that would greatly benefit mankind. I'm in school for this project now but I'm not going to make enough money to do the project. It's going to cost millions. What do I do? I need like 5 million dollars.How is it fair that our "elites" have gorillions of dollars and theyre total scum and I'm just like a pure soul trying to give my gifts to humanity and I can't even get a single million.
>>34336720lmao why is this the goto answer when someone needs help making money
>>34335158Invest in what you know
none of these are gonna get OP $5,000,000 except maybe >>34336573but if you don't want government all up in your shit, you gotta make some moves to get that much money on your ownit is doable but it might (will) take awhile, OP
if you're born in the US, your odds of becoming a millionaire at some point in your life are around 1 in 5not great odds but not the worst, and you can certainly claw your way to $5,000,000 if you really dedicate yourself
>>34338189>if you're born in the US, your odds of becoming a millionaire at some point in your life are around 1 in 5
> be me> in uni> there’s this girl in my sessions twice a week> whenever I see her my heart skips and I get goosebumps> brain basically stops working> this has been going on for 1.7 years> she probably doesn’t even know I exist> one day during exam god himself gives me a chance> end up sitting right next to her for 2 hours> still can’t say a single word like a complete idiot> wind blows my question paper under her desk> instead of asking normally I just stare at her like a moron> she notices and I awkwardly signal with my handsComment too long. Click here to view the full text.
fuck yappin here and go talk
